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later on 11/30/01
And it STILL doesn't feel like the end of November! It's a balmy 65 degrees out - at midnight!

I had a great night out with my friend Jerry. The play was super - a one man show, one-act, and just so well written and well acted. I'd really like to see it again, now that I know how the twisted plot unravels. I really enjoyed it, we both did. Jerry's great to hang out with, we always have great, long conversations about topics I would normally never touch on in depth. So that was a great deal of fun.

The play was at a theatre on Van Dam Street - a place I needed a map to get to. Afterwards, since it was an early show and pretty short, we walked over to Carmine Street to a bar/cafe (where I had once had lunch with Brian from Xceed) for a few glasses of wine, and just spent a few hours people-watching and talking. Really a good night, all in all.

Oof, tired. I went out last night with Jon and stayed over there - but he had to be at work by 10am. Morning people suck.

So, speaking of my physically cold feet. I have bad joints, and they always ache when it's humid or damp out (I know, humid and damp = same thing, pretty much). Anyway, my knees, ankles and hips crack when I'm walking, making it hard for me to sneak up on anyone or walk quietly across a room. And two days ago, I discovered that when it's really cold out, I can curl up my toes and crack them, too! On purpose! Like cracking my knuckles on my hands, only it's my toes. I just think that's the coolest thing, and I've been cracking them constantly since Wednesday or so. Love it.

I'm so weird.

I did some "retail therapy," as Steve would put it, yesterday. Went to Old Navy and did indeed get new pajama bottoms - navy blue velveteen. I also found a chunky red and pink knit turtleneck sweater - just the kind I like, and it's really soft. It sheds on everything, tho. Also - socks. Can't have too many socks, and I seem to keep losing them in the dryer. I stopped in at Bed Bath and Beyond, too - it's right next door. I love this store, it's huge. Dad bought me a gift certificate for BB&B last Christmas, and I had half of it left. Every time I walk in there, I never have anything in mind to buy, so I just wander. Well, needless to say I managed to find enough things to use up the gift certificate on (some Christmas presents, wrapping paper, tape, batteries etc). And I did indeed feel much better when I was done shopping.

Tonight, my friend Jerry and I are going to see Underneath the Lintel, a show neither of us know anything about, but it's supposed to be good.

Don't forget - Derek Jeter is hosting SNL tomorrow night.

I slept like a log last night, which was nice. But then I got woken up at 7am by the pounding sound of jackhammers outside. Not sure if it's from the WTC site or from other construction going on, but it was loud enough to wake me up. Last night, when I went uptown to meet Jesse, I took the 4/5 train, which is over near Broadway. So since I was there, I walked to the corner to look at what used to be our bookstore in building 5. More of it's been pulled down, and last night I could see the cranes moving chunks of debris, and the firetrucks hosing off the side of the collapsed building - it's still burning, after all.

Today it's raining. The jackhammers have stopped, but the weird sounds right now are of someone dragging something heavy (moving boxes? wheeled carts?) across the hallway on the floor below us. Very loud.

Since it's been relatively cooler out (tho still not winter-ish), I've been wearing my sassy flannel pajamas to bed. They're blue, with snowflakes. Well, this morning I must have rolled over oddly as I was stretching, because I snapped the drawstring in front and now the bottoms are broken. So I'll have to go out and find new pajamas today, perhaps a trip to Old Navy will cheer me up.

I've also been sleeping in socks lately. I tend to sleep with my feet uncovered, outside the blankets (no idea why). And I've been leaving my window cracked open at night to get some fresh air inside. Well, my window is a big, sliding glass door actually, and the open part is right at the foot of my bed, so when it gets cold overnight, my feet freeze. Hence, socks.

I'm not really sure why I just shared that with you.

later on 11/28/01
It doesn't really feel like the end of November. It's too warm.

I usually don't go out at night, once I'm settled in for the night. So tonight I was all ensconced(sp?) on the couch, watching the Rockefeller Center tree lighting thing, and thinking I would go to bed. So I go and check my email after the tree lighting, and Jesse suggests that we get a drink or two. I said, "sure, how about tonight?" and we decided to meet up for drinks. I went uptown to Union Square, and we met on the corner on 9th and Broadway and then walked over to the Thirsty Scholar (remember, my favorite East Village bar) for drinks.

We talked about relationships and where you draw that line between friendship and sex, and talked about programming and the tech market and all sorts of things. I love hanging out with Jesse, we don't get together nearly enough.

And now, it's 2.20am and I'm listening to U2 on my headphones and ready to pass out.

So, I am seriously not sleeping well. I'm taking hydroxyzine, which is hopped-up Benadryl, which is supposed to knock me out, but no matter when I take it (early, late), I end up tossing and turning all night. I may just have to revert to plain old sleeping pills.

I am having an incredibly apathetic day. It is also laundry day.

I seriously did nothing today. Except mistakenly ask Missy and Jen if Yahoo Serious was the actor in the Great Balls of Fire movie, because I somehow got it in my head that he was. That'll teach me to attempt pop culture questions after I've taken a sleeping pill.

Happy birthday Susan! And Bruce!

Leftover turkey, corn and mashed potatoes for dinner. Yum. And there's still more left for tomorrow's dinner!

The cats and I have been vegged out all day on the couch watching New York: A Documentary Film on PBS. All day. I belong to Channel Thirteen and highly suggest that everyone does. Send them money. PBS runs such wonderful programs and I grew up watching opera and theatre things, and just a whole slew of educational shows. There, that's the end of my pitch.

I love my evil Canadian twin, Sherry. Her site today just rules.

later on 11/23/01
Bat Boy, as usual, rocked.

I think the Paxil is kicking in - I walked all through the Union Square holiday bazaar with its crowds, and wasn't too stressed. I even found a few gifts for hard-to-shop-for people.

The demolition crews at the WTC have torn down half of our (former) bookstore, in building 5. It was weird to walk down Fulton Street and see a new view of wreckage. Very weird.

So I'm back in the city now. I'm glad I went home for turkey (and leftovers). Took the train to NJ on Wednesday (luckily, there was no more throwing up of food, wine or bile during my trip, just thought you'd like to know), and dozed on the way there. Mom picked me up, and we drove to Matamoros, PA, home of Grandma and Aunt Linda and Uncle Peter. For some unknown reason, Mom brought her cat, Sam, with us. Sam is the demon-spawn kitty. Every time I get near her, she hisses and attacks with her teeth. So my arm is now covered in cat bites and black and blue marks. Oddly, while we were in the car, she would let me scratch her head, but every now and then she'd just attach out of the blue. Ouch. Anyway. It took us 3 and a half hours to get there because of all the traffic on the parkway.

We had dinner at Grandma's, and then walked next door to Aunt Linda's for dessert. I was sleeping on the couch there, and before bed, Uncle Peter showed me his rifle and machine gun collection (he and Aunt Linda are both hunters), as well as the new toy, a high powered sniper rifle that weighs more than I do ("You need a minion to carry this around for you!"). After I commented that I'd never held or fired a gun in my life, I got the tour of the different types of rifles, and Uncle Peter offered to teach me how to target shoot when it's warmer. And if I like it, he'll take me hunting. I think it would be kind of fun, and it would be nice to be in complete control of something. And shooting bears and lions and stuff - that's a hobby I can get behind ;-)

The turkey yesterday was great, and I chowed down on the potatoes, corn and cranberries. I did not chow down on the brussel sprouts. We had a pie medley (banana cream pie, mince pie and pumpkin pie) for dessert. Yum.

Things I'm thankful for:

The ride back to NJ was much less traffic-filled, it only took two hours to get back to Mom's. And I got to drive it all - I really miss driving.

So, back in the city now. Today starts shopping season, which means I will be avoiding stores for the next four weeks - crowds make me claustrophobic, and tourists just annoy me.

Although I don't want to go near a store, today I have to run to J&R Video World for some blank tapes (Staples doesn't stock the T-180 tapes that I need), and then to the post office, hardware store, and eyebrow waxing place (if they're open today). And then tonight I'm having dinner with James, Susan and Matthew, and then we're seeing Bat Boy.

Maybe that third glass of wine was a bad move. I woke up this morning, staggered to the bathroom to pop some aspirin, and got in the shower. While I was rinsing the conditioner from my hair, I nearly blacked out and had to grab the wall for support. And then I had to stop rinsing the conditioner from my hair because this wave of nausea hit me, so I turned off the water, got out of the shower, and spent five minutes throwing up. And then I got back in the shower to finish rinsing my hair.

No, that third glass of wine was a mistake. But I wonder why it didn't hit me until this morning.

I'll ponder that on the train to Matawan. I'll be back tomorrow night or Friday.

later on 11/20/01
Man, it's freezing out! I need to break out my winter coat.

Othello wasn't a great production, but I was thrilled to see Liev Schreiber again, They did the show in the smaller theatre, as opposed to the big space where I saw Hamlet so it was nice to have him ten feet away for most of the show. Mmm.

Afterwards, Michael and I went for drinks (a few) at the Thirsty Scholar, and then I took the world's bumpiest cab ride home, jeez. The driver must've hit every pothole on the way home. Very bumpy. Must sleep.

So tired today. I slept until 11am or so, and went to get breakfast. I was going to pick up a box of donuts at the grocery store (I love the powdered sugar ones), but they were all out, so I got a crumb cake and a carton of milk instead. The box said it was "for crumb lovers" and they weren't kidding - there's maybe a half-inch of cake and an inch of crumbs on top of that. Delicious. I had two pieces and will dive back into it tonight.

So anyway, I ate my crumb-lovers crumb cake and drank my milk, and started to read a book (Silicon Follies, a novel about the hoo-ha, very funny so far, but not-funny at the same time), and I got about twenty pages into it before getting very sleepy. So I took a nap from 1.30pm until 4.30pm, and woke up slightly less groggy. Don't know what it is. I went out to the drugstore and to get the mail, and now I'm chugging caffeine.

Going to see Othello (starring Liev Schreiber as Iago!!!) tonight at the Public, which will be fun, if I can keep my eyes open. And then I'm sure I will fall right back asleep again. Tomorrow I'm heading to NJ, and then to Aunt Linda's for Thanksgiving.

So I'm reading this book about Edwin Booth's Hamlet (incidently, titled The Hamlet of Edwin Booth), and it's super so far. But I may have to skip chunks of the middle of it. Booth had this fan, who during the run of his 1870 Hamlet, saw it eight times and notated in longhand every move that Booth made. Every gesture, every pause, every inflection. And wrote out the text of the play with all of these notations repeatedly, until he had a "perfect" copy of Booth's movements onstage. So the author of this book has reproduced (luckily, not in longhand) the notes, so as to give a picture of Booth's performance. Amazing. But very hard to read, as every line of the text is interrupted to show what gestures Booth made, and which words he paused on, and where he moved on the stage.

So anyway, it's a fascinating book, except for the tediousness of that middle section, so I may skip over it in order to finish the book before it's due back at the library (which is Friday).

Jen and I went to this... interesting... reading that Will did today, for a show called Barsoom! - based on stories by Edgar Rice Boroughs. It wasn't really my cup of tea, and the show wasn't very good, in my opinion, but it was fun to hear Will sing.

I went to the last performance of Three Days of Rain, the play that new friend Jim was doing on 23rd Street. Jim's the guy I met in the Detroit airport when we were uncerimoniously bumped from our flight and we hit it off. The play was very good - I didn't know anything about it going in (other than that it's by the guy who wrote Everett Beekin, currently running at Lincoln Center), and I enjoyed it. And it was good to see Jim again. I also ran into a friend of his that I had met at the benefit thing I went to last month, who remembered me as "the girl Jim met in the airport, right?"

This morning around 6am, there was someone or something thumping on our roof. It was so loud that it woke me and Missy up (but not Jen, who sleeps like the dead) and Missy yelled, "Who the fuck is on the roof at 6am?" We still have no idea. Maybe it was a meteor.

Now PayPal users can use their PayPal money to shop at This does not bode well for me ;-)

So whenever my friend David Levy comes to NYC, we go see bad theatre. Yesterday, we opted for bad television taping instead - we went to a taping of this horrible syndicated show called Change of Heart, where they take couples who aren't sure if they're going to stay together, fix them up on dates with other people, and then get everyone together in the studio to talk about their dates and decide if they're going to stay together. What a miserable concept for a TV show. It looked like the target age was college kids, and that kind of makes sense, but really, I didn't find it all that amusing.

Small world story - David's friend Brian, who came with us, went to school with Jesse.

Anyway, that took up most of the afternoon. By the time we got out, it was nearly 7pm, so I walked to Missy's office, and then she and I walked over to Wai?Cafe to meet Jen for dinner before the movie. And I enjoyed Harry Potter more the second time, but I think that's because I was less tired. I figured out what I didn't like about it - they stuck to the literal plot of the book, which is fine, but they took out all of the details and the "magic" feeling that the book had, and that was disappointing.

Today: tired and feeling nauseated (from the Paxil?)

Anil touched up my Seurat tattoo today - yay! And Steve and I went to see Noises Off again, which was a lot of fun - they've tightened up the show since the first time we saw it. And that was it for my exciting Saturday. Ate a quick takeout Chinese dinner (soup and rice) between the show and Anil's, and the M15 bus took forever to come, and when it did come, the last stop was St. James and Madison, so I had to get out and wait for another bus to come the last six blocks home. And it's cold out today. I wore my red Gap turtleneck knit sweater, which I love, and my brown Old Navy jacket. These are the details I love to share.

Oh! And I'm going to be an aunt! Eric and Masha (of the Marshall clan) are having a baby, and it's due on my birthday! How exciting!

I'm exhausted, and I think it's from the new medicine I'm taking. I slept til 11am or so this morning, and then got up. Jen and I went to see Monsters Inc. at the movies, which was highly enjoyable, and I really liked it. Then I grabbed pizza and went to meet James for Harry Potter. I have to hold my tongue until after Jen and Missy and I see it tomorrow night, but I'll just say that I enjoyed the book more.

And after that, I met up with Steve and his friends for By Jeeves, but by intermission I was feeling so tired and worn out and achy that I left and came home. Just very very tired. I watched ER and now I'm going to bed.

Well, I guess I won't have to take the sleeping pills with the Paxil, since I took the Paxil last night and it promptly caused drowsiness, knocking me flast asleep fairly quickly. Unfortunately, I then woke up around 4am and tossed and turned until 8 or 9, and then I dozed off again until 11am, when my cellfone rang. It was a concerned site reader - and friend, it was someone I knew - suggesting I needed a vacation. Alas, the closest I'm going to get to a vacation is going to Seattle in December. What I need is a nice long massage and well yeah, maybe a weekend somewhere where there are trees and no tourists and no construction crews.

Today's happy news is that Diet Coke with Lemon is now available in convenient two-liter bottles at your (or rather, my) local grocery store. Yay!

And only 100 more pages to go in The Fiery Cross.

Of course, we can't have a day of entirely good news. Dad called and said that Aunt Judi (his sister) went to the hospital to have routine surgery for some colon thing, and while she was there, they discovered that she has cancer, and it's spread all over the place. While "close knit" isn't the word I would use to describe our family, it's still shocking news. Mom's trying to get more info (being the nurse and all) and we'll see what happens.

later on 11/13/01
Cabaret was terrific, again, except for the couple in front of us who munched potato chips through the beginning of act two. Before the show, Steve and I had dinner with two friends of his, Nancy and Bern, who were fabulously hysterical. They joined in my quest to hit on the (cute) waiter, which ended up with me going to the show, and him continuing to wait on tables (that is to say, I did not hit on the waiter).

Love Dr. Stein. I called him back about my prescriptions, and he called Duane Reade to straighten it out. So now I'm fortified with heavy duty sleeping pills (which are really prescription strength Benadryl), and I'm joining the legions of people who self-medicate. Starting today, I'm taking Paxil, which will hopefully kick my anxiety and crankiness in the ass. It'll take a month or so to start taking effect, he said, so I have to call him back in three weeks to let him know how I'm doing.

All I know is I want to stop feeling so worn out and worried and stressed and cranky.

In today's good news, my cats are cuddly and warm and I've missed them. Pixel came and crawled into my lap on the couch while I was reading before, and Mimi is back to jumping on the laptop as I try and type. Such cuties. My stock portfolio is up up up today, which is good. I ordered new checks from Citibank and blank tapes from Staples. I took a zillion packages to the post office. I went to the drug store and picked up my prescription for stronger sleeping pill stuff. They did not, however, fill the prescription for anti-depressants that Dr. Stein said he was also going to prescribe, so I called and left him a message to ask why they only did one of them. And now I'm just getting ready to go meet Steve for dinner and Cabaret. Beautiful day. No bad news today. It's all good.

Enough with the planes falling from the sky, already!

Here's how spacey I was this weekend - Saturday was mine and Kati and Eve's 25th anniversary! I can't believe it slipped my mind! We're going to celebrate in December by seeing The Producers.

Mom and I went to dinner and to see QED tonight, starring Alan Alda. I dug out my playbill from Art (March 1998) to ask him to sign it. So after the show (which I really enjoyed, it being based on Richard Feynman and all), I waited at the stage door for him, and he came out. I asked him to sign it, and he apologized and said that he didn't sign things. But he shook my hand and was glad that I'd enjoyed the play (both plays, actually).

And the kitties are home! I've missed them, and they're so cuddly.

Oh and in other good news, I'm going to the screening of Harry Potter on Thursday with an unnamed friend (unnamed because he probably shouldn't be taking non-coworkers to the screening at Scholastic). And then seeing it on Friday with Jen and Missy - can't wait!

Another binary date. And two months since the WTC attack. Today we are swamped with tourists who want to know how to get to "Ground Zero."

Less than a week til the Harry Potter movie! I'm very excited.

And, true to my word, all I did was read The Fiery Cross yesterday, and now I'm halfway through and loving it. I did take a break for a few hours and went to the movies to see Life as a House last night, which I really enjoyed. Of course, I love Kevin Kline, and he's super in this. And Kristin Scott Thomas - nice to see her in a role where she isn't really playing an ice queen. She was very good, too. And the movie just reminded me of how beautiful the California coast is. Driving from SF to Seattle this past spring was such a gorgeous ride.

I updated my wishlist today, I was bored.

I love that Jon and I can discuss our favorite mathematicians and physicists. That amazes me. And makes me happy.

I feel like I'm always hungry. Must be storing up food inside me for winter or something.

Today is a lazy Sunday. Got up, bought lunch and the Times, read it, watched the news, cleaned out my file folder of old receipts (why do I save some of this stuff?) and read some more of the Gabaldon book. And tonight there's a TV thing on about Harry Potter, so Missy and I are going to veg out on the couch.

Oof, tired. Even tho I slept til noon, I'm really tired. But that's what Saturdays - even in the land of unemployment - are for. I think I will do nothing but read my book all day.

The play was good last night - the two pieces that Adam directed. Dave and Amalie were in both pieces, which was fun, I hadn't seen them since Midsummer in the Park this past summer. They did the same pieces in the 1999 Festival, and honestly, I liked them better in 1999. They added a lot to the pieces this year, which I thought slowed down their pace, and for farce, you don't need to overburden it. It was good to go and see everyone then, I ran into my friend Maureen from Faux Real there and we sat together (she also used to date Dave Gochfeld, so it's funny-weird that she and I get along so well).

After the play, I called Jon and got his voicemail, meaning he was still in midtown at some meeting thing. So I left a message that said I'd be waiting at the Thirsty Scholar on 9th Street, and to come find me there. And I dug back into the Gabaldon book (yay) until he showed up. Of course, by the time he got out of his meeting, it was nearly 10.30, and I was 220 pages into the book, and both of us were tired. The plan was to go dancing, but the tiredness level prevented that, and we were asleep by midnight.

Heard today that I'm going to the final, final performance of The Fantasticks in January, and to the swanky closing party afterwards, which should be a blast! We love dressing up and going to theatre events. Oh yes we do.

OK, I am off to eat a burrito.

My heel was bothering me this morning, and I realized that today is the one-year anniversary of my surgery. At least it's all better (for the most part) now.

I'm spending today reading the new Diana Gabaldon book, which is good so far (I'm what, 20 pages into it?) - I love her books. So so much. And then I'm off to see Adam's show in the Chekhov Festival at 6pm, and then going out with Jon after that.

So today I foiled the plans of the "once you drop out, you'll never go back to school" people, and took my completed application, transcripts and $50 application fee over to BMCC, and filed it with the admissions office. I also spoke to a transcript officer, who had me fill out another form and then go talk to the chairmen of the English and Social Sciences departments, and I got myself exempted from Psych 101 and both English courses - Composition 101 and 201, thanks to the courses I had taken at Montclair. I also filled out the Financial Aid form and sent that in, tho they're going to love me, because I claimed something like $161,000 on my 2000 tax return, but now I'm unemployed. So when I get the notice in the mail that says, "Sorry, we can't give you any grants," I'll have to go back to the financial aid office and explain my extenuating circumstances. Anyway, the next thing that happens is they'll send me a letter in the mail with the date for the admissions testing, to see if I can get exempt from the math course as well, and a letter to let me know if I was actually accepted!

Saw The Full Monty with Jen, Dona and Missy tonight. Our friend Will took over the lead this week, so we went to see him. He was super, as always, talked with him after the show for a while, and then went to O'Lunney's for drinks. We love O'Lunney's, and we love that Mr. O'Lunney likes to buy us rounds when we're there!

later on 11/7/01
Or really really early on Thursday.... right. Drunk, high, good movie (Amelie) that we all loved, drunk on the deck, fingers all tingly when I'm typing... have to get up tomorrow with Jen to get cheap theatre tickets... yay.

Oh and friend Jim sent over the new Diana Gabaldon book, can't wait to start reading! I love her entire Outlander series, makes me nearly with I lived in 18th century Scotland. Sigh.

Ugh, Bloomberg. How long will it take to realize that he's a huge mistake waiting to happen?

Today's exciting jaunt - to the Library of the Performing Arts to watch videos - Songs for a New World (which I like better on the recording, I found the direction of the show to be kind of blah) and the Playwright's Horizon's Floyd Collins (which I liked better when we saw it in Philly and in KY). Good way to spend the day.

And now I'm off to the movies with Jen and Missy.

The unemployment count in the apartment is back to two. And the cats are coming home Monday.

If you live in NYC, you'd better get out and vote. For Mark Green.

I wish I had a piano. And I wish I still played, because I am the proud owner of the piano scores to some of my favorite shows (thanks to a friend who will remain anonymous) and I really, really want to play them.

It's beautiful out. And cold. Love this weather.

I was supposed to have lunch with Steve, but I called him to figure out a time and he never called back, so when it got to be 1-ish, I just grabbed pizza. Now I have nothing to do with the rest of my afternoon, until I go to meet James for dinner and a show. Well, nothing to do but look for work, but you know what I mean.

Yay, got email from David Frost today! My friend David Frost, that is, who I used to work with at Xceed, whose party I went to in Brooklyn a few months ago, and who I thought was moving to California but isn't. Not the interviewer David Frost.

And speaking of email, there is only one 'y' in my email address. Careful when you're sending emails full of impure thoughts my way that the emails actually get addressed correctly. Yes, Jon, that means you ;-)

Ow, hangover.

Tired. Don't want to leave apartment.

Laundry day.

I'm having a very blah few days - contrary to what you might read here. I just feel... blah. Maybe it's because the Yankees lost, but I think I'm just stressed about everything. I want to call Dr. Stein and ask him to put me on something stronger than the Trazodone, because it's just not working for me, and if he can prescribe a way for me to calm down and not be so stressed, I'm all for it. I need to find a job. The air needs to stop smelling like burnt metal. The kids upstairs need to stop jumping on the ceiling (they're back at it). I need to convince Jon to stay in NYC as opposed to going to CT every week so we can actually do some conventional dating stuff, because that would just be swell and it would make me happy. People need to stop getting anthrax. I need to just chill out.

Peter, my wonderful brother, bought me a plane ticket to Seattle for Christmas. So I'm heading there for nine days in December. It'll be the first Christmas that I'm not at "home" - that is, at either Mom or Dad's. I'm kind of looking forward to the trip - I've been saying for a while now that I want to get out of NY and take a nice, relaxing beach vacation, and while Seattle in winter is nowhere near that, I'm sure it'll be fun. And I'm thinking about going to Vancouver while I'm there, they have quaint stuff and caves. And I need to figure out what to do for nine whole days. Hrm.

I'm in the middle of the fourth Sarah Caudwell book. The fourth and final one, actually, as she went off and died after finishing this one.

later on 11/4/01
Lots of "later on" this month, huh.

Anyway, very tipsy.

Producers was super, as expected. I'm very glad Steve got us tickets, as I had a super time and am really glad I went.

What else... oh right, so there was a guy at the show who had a little TV, and at intermission he told us that the score was 0-0. I called Dad and confirmed that (as I've been doing at intermissions all week). After the show, the score was 2-1 Yankees (yay) so I ran to Joe Allen to watch the end of the game. And it was cool to be in a bar of theatre/baseball fans, let me tell you. Anyway, not a cheery night as you can imagine, what with the game being so close and all. Anyway. After we lost (wah), I called Mom and Dad to complain and whine, and called Peter to tell him I'd take him up on his offer to buy me a plane ticket to Seattle for Christmas. So I have to go email him some dates that are good for me to fly out there.

And in good news, I made a date with the cute bartender at Joe Allen (Will) for tomorrow night, and he didn't charge me for my drinks tonight, either. How fun. I hope he remembers to show up tomorrow, I know I will.

And in bad news, the air downtown is horrible tonight. I was nearly choking when I came out of the subway. I usually have my bedroom window cracked open a few inches to let the air in, but tonight I had to close it. In other bad news, I had to wait at Times Square for 15 min for a train, which ended up being an E train. They only run to Canal Street these days, so I had to wait at Canal for another 20 min for a train and didn't get home til nearly 2am.

Right, tired, drunk, must sleep. But can't sleep until I'm sobered up enough to lie down without the room spinning around me. Yay for not having to pay for drinks.

And for some reason, I had the weirdest feeling of - well, not quite deja vu, but a sense of being in London, while I was waiting for the train. Not sure if it was because Tim emailed me earlier and reminded me what a great sushi dinner we'd had while I was there, or if because I'm usually only conscious of waiting for a train while I'm in London. I mean, I don't usually think, "gosh, I'm waiting for the train," when I'm in New York, probably because I do it so often, but when I'm in London, I'm usually tipsy on cider and thinking more consciously about waiting for the next train to arrive. OK, sleep.

Now I have nothing but sympathy for people who lost loved ones at the WTC and the Pentagon, but I find it annoying that the people who live downtown (that is, us, our neighbors et al), who are also suffering as a result of the air, the police, the lack of sympathy from landlords etc, are virtually ignored in all of this. And sure, the police and firefighters are doing a great job (most of the time), but ordinary citizens are heroic as well. So why is it that the "survivors" and "rescue workers" are the only ones being showered in cash, given tickets to Broadway shows, being flown to Phoenix to watch the World Series (ok, that one is me being a little ticked personally) etc? Hi! We have to deal with all of this stress every day, too.

And it also annoys me that here we are, five blocks from the World Trade Center, and we can't go over and see it. There are celebrities (major and minor) tromping through Ground Zero, but the people down here can't go and see and have some kind of closure. I grew up next to the WTC. I used to take the PATH train in every other weekend to visit Dad. He and I used to go to Windows on the World to celebrate things when I was younger. I shopped in the Border's bookstore in 5 WTC frequently (remember? I met Clive Cussler there a few months ago). When giving directions to our apartment, for the past three years I would tell people, "get out of the subway on Fulton Street, and walk in the opposite direction from the Trade Center." I used the WTC as a landmark for finding my way when I'd lose my way uptown or in the village - "oh, there it is, that's downtown so I'm going the wrong way" kinda stuff. It's always been part of my life, and I'm incredibly irked that I'm not well-known enough (or rich enough apparently) to be able to go over and make some kind of peace with the fact that it's not there anymore.

End rant.

I do not want to go see The Producers. I want to watch Game 7. I have asked Dad to tape it for me so I can watch it tomorrow.

I'm stopping my automatic monthly transfer of money into my Merrill Lynch investment account, until I get a job. I'm also cancelling one of my credit cards (since they've sneakily upped my interest rate without informing me, and it's not like I use the card that often now that I'm using my debit card a lot, and halving my available credit will hopefully improve my chances of financial aid should this nursing school thing work out).

later on 11/3/01

Wow, the new Library for the Performing Arts is super, love the renovation. I went up today to FINALLY read But He Doesn't Know the Territory - the Meredith Willson book about the writing of The Music Man and it was totally fun. The book is in their non-circulating research library, so you can't take it out, but must stay there to read it. Which I did. Also spent some time checking out the exhibits there and browsing the stacks of theatre-related books, and I took out two books (see, I do have a library card) - one about Edwin Booth's Hamlet and another book by Ethan Morden (tho admittedly, I haven't read the two by him that I have here yet).

Now I'm off to read and wait for the Yankees to win the damn Series :-D

later on 11/2/01
I completely forgot to mail in my COBRA payment last month. I just wrote them a whopping check to cover October and November. I also wrote a big check to Visa. I need to find a job.

Do I look like someone people should know? I went out tonight - to see Metamorphoses again, really one of the best things I've seen in the past few years - and while I thought I looked normal (cute, not too bad, hair in braids, red red lipstick, Yankees hat), people kept looking at me as if they should know me. I don't think I bear any resemblance to anyone famous, but every now and then, I just keep getting looked at. Weird.

And I am breaking out the flannel jammies (blue, with snowflakes) tonight - yay!

Man, can I foreshadow or what? Here I am thinking, gosh, baseball or Producers, and then today comes the news that Nathan Lane will be out indefinitely because of polyps on his throat. We are DEFINITELY seeing the show - Brad Oscar is taking over and he's very good. I'm glad that I've seen Nathan three times already (and Brad once, yes, you can hate me now), but I'm sad that Kati and Eve won't get to see Nathan when they come in in December. I wonder if the producers of The Producers will continue with their idiotic idea to sell $480 tickets to the show now!

Anyway, tired, must drink caffeine.

Now there're rumors on All That Chat that Nathan WILL be doing the Sunday Eve performance. Maybe he and Craig Bierko can have dinner beforehand, Craig still being out on "vocal rest" from Thou Shalt Not.

much later on 11/1/01
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why it pays to be unemployed, so I can stay up to watch the Yankees beat the Diamondbacks in TWELVE FREAKIN' INNINGS! They'd better win on Saturday, too, because I have Producers tickets for Sunday night, and boy would that be a tough call.

And I'm in the middle of re-reading the first Harry Potter book, in preparation for the movie.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I love Derek Jeter.

So it's a gorgeous day. I figured it would be a good day to walk over to BMCC with my application and transcripts etc. I first went to the post office, over near the South Street Seaport (the complete opposite side of town, mind you, from BMCC). I figured I'd just walk up to Chambers Street and walk crosstown to the college. Well, when I got out of the post office, I walked up towards Chambers, and all of the streets crosstown were blocked by police barricades. I figured it was because I was behind City Hall, so I walked a little more north. But they were still all blocked. Annoying. So, rather than turn around and come all the way back to Fulton Street to cut across, I just walked a little more north to Chinatown and cut across. I love Chinatown, except that I always get lost there (like around Bayard Street? I have no idea where that is) - the streets are as confusing as the West Village, and it's hard to get a bearing on where you are because you can't see any tall buildings on the skyline. Anyway, walked up to Canal Street, did some window shopping, and walked west through Tribeca, down to Chambers Street and west to BMCC.

To be told that my Montclair transcript isn't "official" because it's marked "issued to student" instead of "issued to student in sealed envelope." So I have to send for another copy. I also had to stop back at the post office to get a money order for the application fee, since they aren't fans of cold hard cash ;-)

Anyway, on the walk back, I walked south on Greenwich Street (which is closed to car traffic) and saw all of the trailers set up for the rescue workers, with food etc. There's a Red Cross volunteer station with people making food and peeling carrots and the like. Lots of portable toilets. Greenwich Street is closed to pedestrians at I think Murray Street, so I walked east to Church Street, then south for a bit to the street that I can never remember the name of, and over to Broadway. Especially near BMCC and Greenwich Street, there's this weird mix of students, workers, rescue workers, tourists, police and National Guard. There was a woman asking a National Guardsman to point out on her map which smoking buildings she was looking at, and another woman pointing out to her friends "the structure that you keep seeing on TV." It's weird how close you can get to Ground Zero - yes, there are chain link fences up and plywood barriers and that green construction netting to keep you out, but you can probably walk as close at four blocks away and that's pretty close.

At least the air isn't too bad around our apartment today.

So anyway, I have to write to Montclair to have another copy of my transcript sent, and then I can take the application back. Just have to do it soon, because I want to get accepted for the spring semester so I can start taking the prerequisite courses.


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